I just entered this to CollegeHumor as I love the roommate confessions section but thought I would post it here too as reminiscing and typing it made me lol all over again:
Our friend Max had a huge crush on his straight roommate Josh and came onto him unabashedly numerous times. This was usually pretty funny for all of us but when my best friend Lauren started dating Josh, Max got crazy jealous and would do really douchey things to him to get attention like hit him (really hard and with weapons) and just generally be a dick. After a couple of weeks of putting up with his stupid bullshit, we decided to get him back for ruining our group dynamic. Max’s birthday was coming up so we went to the store to purchase some items for a special birthday English trifle – ladyfingers, jam, custard, cream and two packs of super-strength fast-acting laxatives. As Max was not particularly sweet toothed, we weren’t sure if this would work so we also got a mackerel and hid it in the back of his closet. It was a glorious end to a great day of scheming when we went to his birthday party, presented him with his special dessert, watched him eat the whole thing and literally lick the bowl. We obviously avoided him for the next couple of days, by which time Plan A had been completed - luckily we didn’t share a bathroom with him - and Plan B had just started working, with a strange fishy smell emanating from his bedroom.
We’re still all good friends. Luckily Maxi knew he had wronged us.
![The “Everybody Thinks We’re Insanos Home Journal” is a real book with crazy ideas and jokes and pranks that me and Lauren started in our freshman year of college. [Or freshers at uni if I’m talking like the English person that I am.]
This is half of a joke from it, the rest goes into how UN-anonymous alcoholics are, the whole town knows they’re wasted etc.](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kt7jytxX2L1qztusjo1_400.jpg)
